Sunday, October 30, 2011

Because backstory is important.

I am a newly minted zombie. I was in the hospital recovering from surgery on my hand, chilling in my pajamas when the outbreak came. And as you know, hospitals are ground zero for zombie outbreaks. I haven't been a zombie long, but I find it unpleasant so far. I just spent all this money and time on surgery and then some asshole goes and removes a piece of my neck with his nasty teeth. That's a great way to spread stds, zombies, all that indiscriminate biting. We probably all have herpes.

Some nurse started to wrap my wound, but then I ate her. Now I'm off to see if this eating people thing is all there is to being a zombie. If we're taking over the world, I feel like we should have a more cerebral objective. But first, I'm hungry. Who here still has brains?


  1. Love this backstory. It has an element of comedy, but also of drama (how did you hurt your hand?! Saving a child?!)

  2. You look fantastic!
    This should be the cover of your zombie script; you, looking like that, typing the next draft.

  3. Anonymous3:56 PM

    I really hope they stop making pathetic zombie movies. A zombie should be mysterious. Not in your face. Went to a Halloween party, boring zombies. Be mysterious ...



  4. Yes, yes, Anoymous Person. Very unoriginal of me. That's why I was one of two women at the party who didn't look like whores.

    Just Me, it was exactly that. I hurt my hand rescuing orphans from a fire. The irony is, it was one of those orphans who bit me.

    Thanks, Vanilla.

  5. You look awesome as a zombie. :D

  6. I'm late on this video, crazy week, so you may have already seen, Emily, but in case you haven't, Kirkman on the View. He is adorable, on his very best behavior, and it's like explaining zombies to your grandmother.

    This only relevant if you're Kirkman fan:

    Try finding non-whorish costumes in the 4-6 size range for girls. Egads.


Please leave a name, even if it's a fake name. And try not to be an asshole.

Note: Only a member of this blog may post a comment.