The year in music

Instead of completing the revisions I should be working on (I'll get to it in a minute, dammit!) I decided to make a new mixed CD. If you've ever watched High Fidelity, which is one of the awesomest movies ever, then you know. I'm like that guy. I don't just throw songs I like on a playlist and hit "burn" all willy-nilly. I've been at this CD for two hours. It's art.

I listen to CDs when I'm in the car. I can't stand silence when I'm stuck in traffic and the radio bores me, so I have a big case of CDs I switch between that all serve different purposes. I have a CD I listen to to get me jazzed about working out at the gym, one that makes me sad, one that makes me generally happy, one that's made up entirely of bands that have cute boys in them. Seriously. It's mostly Lifehouse and John Mayer. I worship at the altar of John Mayer, despite Writing Partner's assertion that he is a "pussyass bitch". Writing Partner can suck it.

My favorite so far is a CD that tells the story of a relationship from glorious excited beginning through all the screwed up things we do to each other to the eventual resignation that we'll be okay apart. Each song fits a piece of the story so they bleed into each other. So the songs start out happy, then ease into depression, then come out at bittersweet.

Today's CD was the story of the year I've had. When the year began I thought I was getting married in June. (I know. Go ahead and gasp audibly everybody. You know you want to.) Instead I jumped ship and launched myself down a windy path of self discovery that began with some wild times (Remember Halloween? I don't.) followed by a lot of worrying that the wild times were carrying me away to a very scary place. Then I sat down with myself and said, "Self?" And I replied, which is a little frightening since I was the only one in the room. Actually it probably would have been more frightening if I hadn't been the only one in the room.
"Self?" I said.
"Yes, Emily?" I replied.
"What the hell is wrong with you?"
And I've been working on that answer ever since.

So to comemorate my year of becoming a real grownup I have made my most carefully thought out CD to date. Because sometimes the songs tell the story.

I call it "Clarity"
Here's my playlist:

Just - Radiohead
Crucify - Tori Amos
Broken - Seether
Your Heart is an Empty Room - Death Cab for Cutie
Long Day - Matchbox 20
They - Jem
Your Misfortune - Mike Doughty
Speeding Cars - Imogen Heap
Fix You - Coldplay
Overkill (accoustic) - Colin Hay
Today's the Day - Aimee Mann
Drive - Incubus
Precious Things - Tori Amos
Don't Wait - Dashboard Confessional
Who Needs Shelter - Jason Mraz
Fighting in a Sack - The Shins
You've Got to Learn to Live with Yourself - Ben Folds
Good Enough - Lifehouse
Clarity - John Mayer