Sunday, November 29, 2009

Free TV

I'm trying to give away this awesome TV:

Yes, that is a cabinet TV. It weighs thirty thousand pounds but it's on wheels and I have an elevator, yet nobody on Craigslist seems to want my beautiful television. It's an RCA 27" and it was actually made in 1997 as far as I know. You have to tune it to channel 91. Why? I don't know. It's always been a big mystery. The TV works just fine, but I don't want to move it again and I bought a new flat screen instead with my credit card points.

Every time people come over they say to me, "Is that a cabinet TV? How old is that thing?"

When the Beefcake bought me a Wii for Christmas last year he gave it to me early because he was afraid it wouldn't be compatible with my giant television.

It was made in '97, I swear. It's got stereo and hookups for the old red, yellow and white cables.

I bet you wish you had a TV this cool. Now is your chance.

Look, dammit, if nobody comes and gets this television I'll have to take it downstairs and put it on the damn curb, and that's more work than I want to do right now. The TV works just fine and I watch stuff on it every day. It would look great as a movie prop. It's its own entertainment center because you can just throw everything on top of it, which is what I have done for the past eight years. And did I mention that it's on wheels? Because it's on wheels. Who has a TV on wheels? Well now, you can.

Somebody come and get this goddamn television. I live in Hancock Park and there's plenty of parking in front of my building. Plus I'll give you a free used air filtration thingee or a bag of maybe used, maybe new AAA batteries.


  1. Just toss it to the curb. It's not worth it.

    Congrats on getting the house btw. :)

  2. Thanks.

    "Tossing it" on the curb is exactly what I want to avoid. I'm not sure you understand just how much it weighs.

  3. what about donating it to Goodwill? They're always accepting this kind of stuff.

  4. That would involve not only taking it downstairs, but putting it in someone's truck, driving it to Goodwill, and unloading it. Believe me, Goodwill has gotten much merchandise from me in the past two weeks.

    The goal is to get someone to come and get it. If they don't, I plan to put it on the curb, but I don't want to have to move it when I've got so much else to do.

  5. I would SO BUY THAT if I lived near you.

  6. Anonymous7:51 AM

    OMG you're adorable.

    I moved and posted a 2002 TV on Craigslist which took 3 days to find a home (free!) but maybe cuz it was huge like yours. Then the boxes of junk I left out on the porch with a Craigslist ad (kitchen ware, nic-nacs, etc) disappeared overnight. Go figure... (maybe not enuf people have trucks...? Or beefcakes?)


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