Thinking about Avatar

Saw Avatar. I am kind of amazed that this movie made so much money because I definitely doubted Cameron on this one. How does he do it? Did he sell his soul to the devil? It's not a bad movie by any means, but it's not really a great movie either. Yet here he is, raking in the dough just like he said he would. Astounding.

Okay now I'll say some things I thought about in the theater:

It's about time somebody finally made Piranha 3D. I'm not sure how we survived without it.

Okay the 3D is badass. Fully integrated.

Yep. Just like everybody said. Dances with Aliens.

This is starting to remind me of Star Wars: Episode One when they went on that underwater chase with the fish and the bigger fish and it was sort of like "Do we really need this long alien animal chase scene, or is it just showing off how cool our technology is?"

Why do aliens love apostrophes so much?

Why are none of the Na'vi fat? Surely at least one of them is kind of lazy. Maybe that's what we're not seeing. They're like a Logan's Run type society where they chase down fat people and eat them. Humans don't seem so bad now, do they?

I'm sorry I'm white. I didn't mean to be. I never meant to colonize anybody.

Would it have been so wrong to just let Sam Worthington be British instead of making him do that weird accent? Why in these movies do only Americans ever conquer space? Oh yeah. Manifest Destiny I guess. Damn us.

Giovanni Ribisi is the most adorable villain ever.

This is the least butch role Michelle Rodriguez has ever played.

I like that one main alien chick's voice.

I wish I had a giant bird I could fly to work.

Look at all these people. We look so cool, wearing sunglasses in the theater.

When you have a film in 3D please edit it down to under two hours. Prolonged exposure to 3D movies gives me a headache. Avatar gave me a headache. Anybody else get a headache?

Avatar: Not another teen movie

Sometimes when I start to get all mad about something, I think about starving kids in Africa and it kind of puts things in perspective. Someone compared Carson Reeves to a rapist.

Anyway, today I polled my classes about whether or not they'll see Avatar because I was curious as to whether or not the film appealed to the teenage audience since they were a huge part of Titanic's draw. Generally, the answer is no. Only a smattering of hands went up.

Here's what surprised me. Several of the students asked me why the aliens are blue. "Because they're aliens," I said, making a mental note to read that article I saw where James Cameron talks about why he chose blue.

"But then how come in the cartoon they're orange?"

Huh.

Apparently - and parents may know this, but it came as a complete mystery to me - there is a Nickelodeon cartoon called Avatar: The Last Airbender. All the kids thought this Avatar was that Avatar. But as you know if you've paid attention to previews lately, The Last Airbender is M. Night's latest project.

I was kind of surprised to learn this, since The Last Airbender sounds retarded. He bends AIR? Really? Is that how far down the superpower list we have tumbled? But when you realize it's a Nick cartoon, I guess it makes more sense. Kids like that kind of stuff.

At any rate, apparently the aliens on this show are orange, and since Avatar is also about aliens, the kids are confused. They seem to have liked the cartoon, but most of them aren't interested in seeing Avatar because it doesn't look like the cartoon so they're not sure what to expect.

Teenagers are the most desirable of markets in the film industry. I wonder if anyone in marketing thought about that?