Twilight is just another knight's tale

I just thought of something just now while I was typing out a response to a Done Deal post.

Twilight is a knight's tale.

This is an old story. Ever read The Canterbury Tales? Don Quixote? The myriad of knightly tales Cervantes made fun of in Don Quixote?

I'm talking about courtly love.

If you ever want to roll your eyes out of your head, read A Knight's Tale, the first tale in The Canterbury Tales. It's all about two best friends who fall in love with a woman at first sight and fight over her while she has no idea either man even exists. It's all about that hero who fights for the beautiful, unattainable woman. They call it courtly love.

That skinny emo vampire dude is a modern knight. He's strong and good looking and would sacrifice his life for the beautiful, unattainable girl he loves. He can never truly have her, but he'll do anything for her.

The girl is the modern day princess. She's on a pedestal. She's got some mystical beauty, some special element that makes her superior to all other women, and often the knight - in this case a vampire or a werewolf - falls in love with her immediately. The old knight's stories of courtly love were all about the man falling for the woman just by seeing her beautiful face. Doesn't that emo vampire love that wistful emo girl because she looks like somebody from his past or something? That's what I got from the previews. Then he sets out to protect her. He even has to sacrifice and leave her because he loves her so much. That's perfectly in line with the old knight story where he travels the world in her name, but can never have more than a handkerchief or a kiss from the woman he adores.

So it's not a new thing. It's a very, very old thing, and clearly it's still relevant. So in case you were wondering why teenagers love this stuff - teenagers have always loved this stuff. Teenagers are still naive enough to think this is what love is. They love the idea of pure love - it's the same reason they love Romeo and Juliet. It's that idea that when you love someone, fireworks explode and the universe spins in a new direction.

They don't realize that true love is your boyfriend gleefully showing you the massive shit he just dropped in the toilet.