Those crazy Thais

I was just watching the Thai film Chocolate. Just the other day someone else told me women couldn't star in action films, so after seeing this movie I've decided to move to Thailand where women are equal and respected by all.

I liked that the film went old school Asian martial arts method. It front loaded the plot so the second half of the movie just jumped from one action sequence to the next. No slow moments to fix stupid plot shit - the exposition was done on the run, my favorite kind of exposition.

But I'll tell you what I liked the most. The girl didn't fight like a dude. She fought like a girl, a badass girl. That's the trick with female action leads - let them be women while they kick ass. Stop trying to make them tiny dudes.

One day the American film industry will figure this out. I'm doing my best to make it happen.

As the movie ended, the really baffling part took over. At the end of the film they did that whole Jackie Chan look at all our injuries on set bit, but this this makes Jackie Chan look like a pussy. Those fucking Thai stunt guys, man. They are crazy. You know, when the stunt goes exactly like it's supposed to and people still end up bleeding profusely from the skull, you may need to rethink your safety precautions. There's a point at which dudes are supposed to fall from a three story height and land on concrete, and they do exactly that. No mats. No movie magic. Naturally, they sustained some serious injuries.

I used to know a guy who liked to jump off buildings for fun and stun gun himself in the eye because it made people laugh, but now I'm thinking maybe he's not so hard core. He needs to move to Thailand and get some street cred.