Friday, January 20, 2012

Go to Haywire.

This has been an insanely busy week. I had a doctor's appointment on Tuesday to get started on therapy for my wrist, I had a walk through with the caterer Wednesday to plan for the wedding, I had a studio meeting on Thursday, and in between I've been managing a big sales push for yearbooks at work, so I haven't had any time to actually sit down all week. I had a whole slew of blog posts planned and no time to write them.

The more stuff I have to do, the more wired I become. I'm sure by the time I walked into the office on the lot yesterday I looked like a cocaine addict. I hope I wasn't too frightening.

Tonight's activity is Haywire.

Haywire. Go see it, everybody.

As of this writing, it's got 84% on Rotten Tomatoes. Hey, that's good! It's got an ass kicking chick who actually knows how to fight. Did you see that arm bar she pulled on Channing Tatum in the first five minutes? Textbook. Don't know what an arm bar is? You don't have to! It's still awesome to look at!

Like Ewan MacGregor? This movie has that!

If this movie does well, cool options open up for me. If this movie does not do well, I've got an uphill climb with some of my projects. So believe me, I'm completely self-centered when I say please, everyone, go see this kick ass movie. You know you want to. You've been thinking about it. You said to yourself, hey, maybe I want to see that tear jerker about the kid and his dad and whatever? No, you don't. That kid doesn't even punch anybody in the face in that movie.

Remember how George Lucas has betrayed you? Yeah, you don't want to go through that again.

Underworld is okay, but we all know the fourth of anything isn't all that great.

So go see Haywire, because it's awesome, and also because seriously go see this movie.


  1. Very funny post. And I'm sold - I'll go see it.


    "So let it be written. So let it be done."


  3. I did go see it -- and I have and had the same selfish reasons as you to want it to succeed -- it won't and it doesn't deserve to.

    HAYWIRE is a mess: Gina can't act, the music is god-awful, there are plot holes Michael Bay would be proud of, dialogue is pitiful and weak and Soderberg's "take" on the action genre was not my style. It has moments of tension and enjoyment, but those don't start until about 45 minutes in, when there's a solid 30 minutes or so, but then the plot goes off the rails again. No emotion, very little fun and not very smart. Also marketing is very different than actual style (which is probably what lead to the D+ cinema score).

    - Signor Ferrari

  4. I liked it a lot. I'll post about why tomorrow.

    I agree, the marketing was all wrong. I don't agree that it was an unworthy film.

  5. Unworthy? That's too strong. But I'll be interested to see what you enjoyed about it.

    For me:
    -- The multiple, bad plot holes were a problem. I know some people don't care about story, but this one had big problems.
    -- Things like music and sound volume and such is personal preference and we could argue all day about such, but to me the music could not have been much worse.
    -- Some of the set pieces were quite good. Some were so-so and some were comical.
    -- Gina's bad acting was a real problem for me.
    -- But more than anything, the film had no emotion. I have never been in an audience at any sort of action or thriller film of any sort with less energy in the audience -- and I think it because the film was just so flat. It gets somewhat tense and engaging about 45 minutes through, for about 30 minutes or so, but the opening is such an awful mess it is hard to care by the time you get there.

    Interestingly, my wife disliked it far more than I did.

    In the grand scheme, I'd say it had a couple quite good moments and a few decent to good moments. But some decent set pieces can't save HAYWIRE any more than they can save TRANSFORMERS 2 and 3. Not nearly as bad as those turds, but ultimately has some of the same problems.

    Overall there is no reason to bother with this film unless you are intensely curious with some aspect of it.

  6. It is such a great film. I don't think there's going to be a better film released this year, honestly.

  7. Taking exception to the comment about Lucas. I realize it was semi-facetious, but Red Tails was a highly risky film for the studios to make, and you want to encourage that.

    I don't think the failure of Haywire will kill the female-driven action film. Alien, Underworld, Kill Bill, anything with Angelina Jolie in it, have all had plenty of success. What it will impact is Hollywood's willingness to take a chance on MMA stars who can't act.

  8. I think Soderbergh and Lem Dobbs getting back together is a far more credible reason to be excited for this movie. I like Carano, hot as shit, and she can fight. But she doesn't have a track record. Soderbergh and Dobbs both have wonderful track records.


Please leave a name, even if it's a fake name. And try not to be an asshole.

Note: Only a member of this blog may post a comment.