Halloween costumes I have worn

Halloween is again upon us. This time next year I'll be preparing for Trick or Treaters, which I am all kinds of excited about, but for now my only mission is to find a cheap outfit for the party.

I usually go as some kind of fictional badass woman. For three years I was Buffy. I had a shop teacher at the school where I worked make a stake, and when he handed me the finished product it filled me with fear and also power. I could seriously kill people with this thing.

What I thought was funny was how I got past the cops on the street with my deadly stake, but my then boyfriend's plastic light saber was confiscated and later stolen.

The light saber was actually mine, because years before I had gone as a Jedi. I decided Jedis wear black under their robes - this was before the new movies - so when I took off the robe in the club everybody thought I was Trinity. So I guess I was two badass women that year.

One year I tried to go as the cheerleader from Heroes but couldn't find the right costume in time, so I ended up getting a costume at Frederick's and going as a Poodle Skirt girl. Eh. I don't feel proud of that year, especially since I ended up a Hollywood cliche when someone offered me one too many Jello shots. That night is the reason I no longer accept Jello shots. I blame the lack of superhero outfit.

Two years ago I was totally entrenched in my boxing, so I went as a boxer. Dudes tried to fight me on the street. I accidentally punched a drunk guy in the face when he fake attacked me.

Then last year I had the Beefcake with me so I thought we could go as a team. I was Sarah Connor from T2 - she is one of my all time favorite characters - and he was supposed to be Arnold, but his black jacket was like a Members Only or something so instead of looking cool he just looked like a big guy in a jacket with a girlfriend in all black.

This year I have no money. We spent it all on a house. Plus I packed everything already.

So I decided to try Sarah Connor again, but this time throw on the hat and try to find a belt. I've got a righteous pair of black BDUs and I can borrow a knife holster from the Beefcake.

If the Beefcake joins me as The Terminator for real this time, cool. If he doesn't, well, he's broke too after buying the other half of the house so I can hardly blame him.

Is it new and original? No. Is it awesome? Yes. Will I eat Jello shots? Never again.

Shit. I should probably do some pushups. That bitch has some big old arms.

What are you wearing Saturday night?