Friday, October 15, 2010

Party time

It was fancy Hollywood party night last night thanks to the powerful influence of an awesome dude who may or may not wish to be identified here. I got to schmooze in Beverly Hills in a fancy brand new cocktail dress.

I didn't give out a lot of business cards, but I did meet some cool people. At one point I saw Jeremy Piven squeeze right by me - he is shorter than I expected and has taken up having hair - and I raised my voice so that he could overhear me talking about my forever love for Zombie Strippers. I don't know if he heard me, but he did not stop to talk about Jenna Jameson shooting ping pong balls out of her vagina. His loss.

Robert Forster was in the elevator with us although at first though I recognized him as a celebrity I couldn't figure out who he was. He kept smiling at me. Nice man.

Aaron Sorkin came by to give a speech but he didn't hang out with the crowd because they would have crowded him to death. How ironic it would be if he were killed by conversations.

Servers were passing around shots of tequila which I did not drink, because ever since Halloween four years ago when shots went down and came back up again in four different puking sessions, I refrain from anything shot related. They also passed trays of tiny sirloin burgers but the one dude and his harem of like four scantily clad girls enveloped the tray like a plague of locusts. I never did get a burger, but I did get a tiny red velvet cupcake. I lost like two pounds from not eating that day. You know how when you think you're getting a lot of food you don't eat and inevitable there will be no food, but if you do eat inevitably there will be tons of food? Yeah. It was like that.

There was one girl dressed in bright red with a cowl neck exposing her boobs and barely any material covering her hoo hah. For some reason she was interested in this little dude with red shoes. His lucky night.

I got three compliments on my dress. I have finally arrived in society.

My shoes, though awesome, squeezed the hell out of my toes all night, so to get to the bar after the party I took them off and walked barefoot through Beverly Hills. I'm really glad the party wasn't in Koreatown.

When people get drunk they really get open about the dealings they've had around town. I highly recommend just grabbing a glass of water and listening.

6 comments:

  1. Anonymous10:35 AM

    Emily,

    Just wondering, was 99.9% of the people there drinking.

    Lets say, one is not a drinker, will he or she fit in...

    I hate parties for this reason, too much drinking and closet drinkers.

    But urban myths says most screenwriters and film crews are drinkers of booze and wine.

    My lost.

    Not my scene.
    JOE

    ReplyDelete
  2. There's always plenty of water and soda. Nobody will care, and if some drunk does start to pressure you, all you have to say is that you're driving. It's not like college.

    ReplyDelete
  3. I had heard that Robert Forster is just about the nicest guy you could meet, then I met him and you know what? He's just about the nicest guy that you could meet. I only wish I'd told him how much I love his final moment in JACKIE BROWN.

    Now, please excuse me while I pour myself a drink.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Anonymous1:18 PM

    Mr. Peel,

    lol

    could you make me a drink to this specification, the next party I go to I am going to have have a bottle of this drink but follow the instruction carefull -
    --------------------
    /First, it is necessary to choose a proper wineglass. The specialists of cognac blending recommend a tulip-shaped wineglass, but the low, spherical wineglass will be OK too. 20-25 ml of cognac pour into the wineglass and heat in a palm for 8-10 minutes. If you warm up the wineglass in another way, for example by burn-in lighter, all aromatic matters will evaporate.
    Take the wineglass and … Look at the surface. The cognac color can tell you much. For example, the light-straw color points to young cognacs, straw-yellow, amber, golden and auburn-red - to older. Always look at the color – it characterizes the age of cognac.
    Then you should smell cognac. Put the nose to the edge of the wineglass and inhale " montant odors". It’s usually floral or fruit odors: violets, iris, rose, pear, cherry, apricot, plum, fig, quince, grapefruit, jasmine, chestnut, orange zest, nut, or peach. Come off and shake up cognac, now bring the wineglass to the nose again, inhale ...
    ...
    Now you are ready to try cognac. Make a small sip. The cognac will pass and make you to estimate all complication and individuality. We drink cognac in a circle of close friends and in pleasant atmosphere. Cognac perfectly combines with coffee (preferably with cognac XO), cigar (special cigar cognac) and chocolate (preferably with cognac VSOP or XO).\
    WWW.COGNACGUIDE.RU


    There is a great variety of ways how to drink cognac. Cognac is mixed with soda water or tonic. There are some recommendations how to obtain an excellent aperitif wine:

    use cognac VS or VSOP for blending;
    20 ml of cognac + 50-60 ml of tonic (or soda water) + pieces of ice;
    combinations of cognac with citric or orange juice are possible.
    Cognac is popularly used as the cocktails fundamental:
    use cognac VS or VSOP for blending;
    possible combinations with tonic, fresh juice;
    a drop of liquor or syrup;
    shake up in a shaker, add pieces of ice.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Anonymous9:03 PM

    yeah,

    saw you at the big break party. you look stunning in that cocktail dress (and no, this is not one of those craigslist missed connections post).

    i'm surprised piven didn't try to pick you up, he's quite a player

    ReplyDelete
  6. Thanks! You should have come over and said hi.

    ReplyDelete

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