Friday, November 16, 2007

Strike-related Craigslist ads part 2

1) Our firm specializes in outsourcing mercenary work from Fortune 500 companies that need to keep their hands clean. We act as middlemen, designing offensive logistics with our clients, and then through intermediaries give you the assignment. Upon completion of an assignment, we will leave cash in a designated area that is tax free and untraceable. We will only communicate with you via e-mail. We are reaching out to writers because nobody in corporate America knows who you are, plus you have the imagination needed to be resourceful in a pinch. Please e-mail your resume and salary history. Crime Drama Writing experience a plus, but not necessarily required.

2) The strike will go on for a long time. It is time to get balls and come back to work. The producers will break the union. Get paid now and work now. If you come back now we will forget and let the past be gone. I need writers to keep making shows for sweeps. FOX Idol will not be only show viewers will look forward too. Man/women up and come back.

We have bought extreme SUV's with darken (more than normal) windows to get you onto the lot. No one will know. Work in a special unit trailer and video conference your input to the stage. You can wear a stocking so no actors will notice you when on the video conference. We will write contracts through agents and keep everything confidential. If you need cash please apply. NO 24 writers please.

3) Untapped NON-UNION talent. I won't lie, I have no published experience. But I CAN and WILL deliver. I live in Pittsburgh but can e-mail GREAT writing at a moment's notice. Strikes mean nothing to me. I have ideas for new shows and can write for current shows in a heartbeat. And I can beat the pants off any of your pampered, union writers without hesitation.

Don't believe me? Just send me a short e-mail, whatever you need, first script's free. Cost you nothing but a few minutes, and the reward will be well worth it.

Need to start shooting next summer's popcorn fest? It's right here, waiting. Need a script finished at the last minute at great expense? Don't bother! I will beat any scab's script and any scab's price! Just try me! I dare you!

4) Allow me to be your stand-in on the picket line.
Hours, days, weeks, months....I'll walk the line.
All that I ask is that when this strike ends
Your agent or manager read my script!
It's getting cold out there, e-mail me,
I'll meet you at any studio.

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